Saturday, 11 April 2015

Happy Families

Ha! In my paternal family? In my family full stop? Behave!!

Now, with MrB's family I have been spoiled: you send cards at birthdays, give hugs to say hello and are generally friendly.

In my paternal family, it's awkward. Maybe it's just my take on it, it's perhaps how I view it, being socially awkward and anxious I'm not exactly seeing social interaction.

Anyway, get over it, that's why I took the children with us, as a social buffer and so that they would have a memory associated with their Great Grandad, even if it was just a party.

I hate people who ignore me at social things, there are two of them in my life and one of them was there today. This particular on e, my dad's wife of 18 years, took a dislike to me about 6 years ago when I had a frank discussion with her and my dad about coming to my wedding (i.e. that it was non negotiable).  Her reason at the time was that I appeared to take my mum's side..
When I was 15, living with my mum and basically dependent upon her for everything due to her need for control and emotional neglect. But this woman chooses to hold a judgement I made more than half my life ago against me.

Now, I expect her to behave in this way and my standard method is to try to achieve early eye contact with an open mind and see what happens. This was ignored (in fact, my dad ignored me, like he did at the last family gathering we were all at together).. I digress!

So then, after that test of the waters, I go about my business, trying not to take it personally that some idiot thinks that I'm not worth their time (I invariably do)


When the time for leaving was upon us, we were first to leave as we had a decent journey home. I had to fight the urge to just walk out and painstakingly made sure that I said goodbye to anyone I was related to. I hate doing this, but i felt it was necessary as i will most likely never see some of them again (that's a shame, but I can't fix anyone but myself right now).

I said goodbye to the ladies in the kitchen, I knew 3 out of about 6 of them. They all turned to say goodbye EXCEPT my dad's wife.

I don't have to prove myself to her, she is much older than me and if she can't be arsed being nice then I need to not care. What sort of selfish idiot does that at a funeral reception party. What a dick.

There, I said it.

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